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4 AM on an uneventful Thursday

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4am on an un eventful Thursday The alarm didn’t go off There is no pressure to wake so, I lay there feeling calm as a lake As if by chance came a vision of some sort Didn’t feel like dream Or that’s what I thought I saw myself decorating the Christmas tree The one in my living room Away from myself and felt free sitting on the couch I watched the scene A moment so rare and serene Its only fitting I call him he he looked different, Far from glee Thinning hairline, curves and hazed face like he is stuck in a fricking maze He bent down and picked up a red star Tied it neatly with a string Placed it right at the top Perfection seemed to be his goal Why is he so serious screamed the soul? I took a good look at him The path he travelled The difficulties he overcome The gloomy days that went by  The crooked lines and sagging eye Engulfed in the sight so rare I sympathised with him He is supposed to be happy He has everything and someone to care He fought ...
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To the senstive self

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  Too many times I was told I am too sensitive Too many times I was told I need to man up Too many times I was told to shake it off and not feel a thing Too many times I was told being this sensitive would not help me with 'real world' however, Too many times The people who say this are the 'real world' i live in Too many times They had the power to heal with words but choose to hurt Too many times I tried ignoring my sensitivity that enables me to empathize to understand to feel to learn and to forgive Too many times its my sensitive self that helped me to be gentle to others and to bring back my righteousness even when others least deserved it For the first time I realized today, sensitivity is my virtue being sensitive is not my curse but my blessing and by accepting myself and being my sensitive empathic self I can be of service to others and enable them to be truer to their self heal wher...
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Unchaining a Tree

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Someone told me that writer’s block is basically the imaginary friend not willing to talk to the writer. If this is the case I think I lost mine, or perhaps he wandered off to a land where writing is as effortless as a waterfall or a sunrise.  And this post is my call, my ode and my plea for his mercy to come back to me. Every morning I take a 30-minute bus drive to work, through a freeway which is mostly surrounded by trees with little or no buildings of any sort. It is very calming journey. Except the humming sound of the bus, there is no other noise. In fact, it is kind of soothing to travel with that sound, it makes no sense and forms a background music to my thoughts. Morning sun plays with shadows on the floor and people are usually quiet, either scrolling through their phone or sleeping.  On these journeys, I either meditate, read or simply gaze through the window on the passing by sight with contemplation. I also make mental notes on the chang...
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Raagi seeds from the loft

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“Where are all the Golu Park dolls?”, I asked my mom over the quiet lunch.  “enda kanna. It  must be on the loft” ,  she looked at me curiously . Without waiting for my reply she continued “Do you want me to pack that so you can take it Singapore? “. That was a lovely gesture I thought.   She understood that I missed Golu and I might be interested to have them. Only she could understand me without much words. “Nothing ma, just wanted to see them”  ( pic courtesy : Google ) After lunch I managed to get on the big stool made specially to access loft, and like a director of a movie, she guided me to the location among boxes of stuff.   Golu is a 9-day festival where we adorn the home with beautiful mud idols of god. Park is basically a miniature village usually set up around Golu on sand. Its decorated with plastic houses, trees, villages, trains etc. “ Paathu kanna there is so much dust, why don’t you wear a kerchief mask, you are allergi...
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Toilet door, 5$ Race & Uber Smiles

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You know the embarrassing feeling when you open the door to the toilet at the same time as another person. Don’t swear on me yet, I guess the next worse thing is Looking directly into the eyes of stranger for more than 2 second. I say up to 1 second is still acceptable for Singapore.  So this happened to me, when I pooled in an Uber cab (BTW its just 5$) on my way to work. I was upset about a problem with my living situation and was banking loads of anger, ready to snap anytime. Which is why I avoided conversation with fellow passengers. We stopped at the traffic light and my gaze fell on the construction truck next to us.   Behind the truck was array of workers presumably on their way to work. If you have lived in Singapore, for longer than expiry date of bananas, you have witnessed this for sure. From the crowd who were catching up on their sleep, he looked right back at me. To my shame it lasted longer than 2 seconds. He had a dark serious face with thick bea...
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Note to Thyself : Carry an Umbrella

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They say when you pray for rain, have enough faith to carry an umbrella... but what if your faith is wavering? Perhaps your umbrella may be broken or you are so tired to even carry yourself out yet alone an umbrella. Perhaps you are scared to show your umbrella to people who might ridicule your faith. All said and done you knew in your heart that if you could make yourself carry that umbrella with unwavering faith, it would rain. I am here right now at the path way to my future and all that follows this statement is conversation to thyself. When it’s not my time   I remember the trip I always wanted to take. Money, was always the main concern. However when I stumbled on that advertisement from the travel company offering a package tour at 50% slash rate, I found a different excuse. I convinced myself that I don’t have enough holidays left. God listen to my prayers and she bought that advertisement to me. The time was right, perhaps I wasn't ready. When I have given up...
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