Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Dump your Gramophone

Remember the time someone said something to you and you couldn't get it out of your head. Probably you will end up all night thinking about why he/she said that in the first place. Like a old gramophone record it goes on and on, and every time you would try to come up with better answers or insults you could have possibly given to the other party. Yeah thats exactly I am talking about!

Understanding :
I remember this story from a teacher who taught me meditation. A old man accompanied by two children was sitting in the railway station. The kids were making noises, jumping around, and fighting with each other. A disturbed commuter asked the old man to keep the kids silent. To which he replied, I dont know how to control them , they lost their mother this morning.  What seemed like a pure angry and irritation turned into sympathy and love for the kids.

Thats the power of understanding. As much as we want to put ourselves first and declare what a prick the other person is, there must be very good reason why he/she is so. The more we understand the more we can find easier to forgive. No one's perfect , just like us.

Forgiving ourself
You cannot make everyone happy :) Stop being hard on yourself.
More often we feel guilty about the whole thing. "why did i let him talk to me like that" , " why did i do that which invited such remarks" - you get the drift.  Say  to yourself "I forgive myself when i make mistakes" and move on.

When things are bad, communicating with the other person will only worsen it. But we can follow some rituals to reduce the pain. As crazy as it seems, it works!

  1. Pour down everything you have to say in a paper, Yes it HAS TO BE WRITTEN in paper.it symbolizes getting it out of your system.  Finish the writing by saying  " I forgive you (the person's name)" . Then either burn it, or tie it to the balloon and send it away.
  2. Take a hand full of salt , think about your bad memory, and drain it in sink.
  3. If you are lucky to have a beach in your town, stand in the water and wash of your hands, u dont even need salt.

Forgive for yourself.

The end result is, we want to move on and forgiving the other person will do it. Its not for them but for our own health and peace of mind. Carrying the bad memory is like carrying a baggage and trying to walk, sooner or later you get tired. Before sleeping bring their face and say" I forgive you" . Do it as many nights as you need.

I deduce this from the books i read and from my meditation gurus, please feel free to comment what you might do in the similar situation. It would help someone who is in need.


ps: Pardon my writing skills, I would get better as time goes by :)

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Stuttering thoughts

Its almost the 10th time I have opened this window to type a new post. The first line of the post is like the opening sentence to the girl in the bar. It might either go way better than you think or fall flat on your face. And then comes the second line, now that you got the attention, its important to say something smart.

Have you played angry birds ?  ( ok not so smart but questions do help). If you are not familiar with this iPhone game you might as well ask my mother ( she is yet to return my iPod touch, thanks to gaming addiction).  I always found the direct hit on the pigs or the castle wont help to finish the game. The trick lies in finding the exact point, when hit would start a domino type demolition effect. A catalyst shot for the ripple effect.

Many ideologies say your current state of life depends on your current state of mind , which is sum of your positive and negative thoughts. By tipping the scale of positive thoughts to jus 51% you can start the ripple effect of attracting all that is good for you. Imagine the time when everything suddenly started falling in place , yup thats what i am talking about. To let the good times roll all we need is that one single stroke of luck   vibrant positive thought  ( it can be a good karma, a affirmation or a simple selfless help.)

I have attended the Anna hazare protest in bangalore to support the cause. Although there are numerous controversies surrounding the lokpal movement, I feel good to have participated . For once I was not sitting at home complaining, I was out there , a common man putting his effort to make the nation a better place.  I think this is a good change, for the tipping scale of people wanting to change something is growing .

So next time you think about doing something small like switching off electricity or helping a visually challenged at the bus stop, or participating in cause that you feel right about, think this. You are not another small drop in the ocean, you could be the 51 man tipping the scale, starting the ripple effect to a whole new world.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Message from the stars

Hey there,

Two friends met after what seemed to be eternity. They both used to spend hours after hours chatting about each other's life and zillion things under the sun.  Not all  interests were similar, in fact the ones that arent made their conversation much more interesting. During some of their darkest time, both stuck to each other proving  friends are the best shrink anyone can get.

Then life happened.  The only thing to do was accept it and shuffle and recreate their priorities. What once a beautiful time together  became a distant, yet sweet memory in the heart.  There were million ways to be in touch yet they drifted apart carried by the strong current of life.

One fine day it happened, they met. There must be something in the stars, or perhaps sheer fate or just a random power cut in the evening. Like the one that happens during Indian summer, where watching stars in the terrace in the cooling breeze is the best thing to do. Humming a old song, or amusing about what life used to be before things became important than people.  Thats what happened to these two.

They sat next to each other, no one complained about not keeping touch, they are just happy to see each other and be in company. For words doesn't matter in friendship its the feeling of belonging to each other.

Thats us , you and me and I am happy to see you again.