Rumour has it all

I have gaps; you have gaps let’s fill each other’s gaps - This is what my brother and I found while searching for inspirational quotes to put in the marriage invite. Needless to say we spend the next ten minutes laughing like mad. My younger brother’s marriage is due in 6 weeks and I have been running around like a scorpion bitten mad monkey.

Something that really cheered me up before few days.
Never in my life had I imagined to shop 45 sarees, 28 shirts and several children wears, and all at one shot! I am no shopaholic, it’s what we do in Indian marriages (where groom family goes into debt and bride’s goes almost bankrupt). As part of the 3 day ceremony, we are suppose to gift new clothes to our relatives, arrange transportation (if the venue is out of town) and also feed them with DUE RESPECT- All three days!

All I want for christmas is you honey, I dont care about whats underneath my christmas tree
While the arrangements need to be 100% perfect, the DUE RESPECT has to be 200%. One of my aunts did not tell us her kid’s dress size, because she felt we should take her for shopping. After several irritating conversations over phone (which made my mom almost to tears), I had to go down to their home with 3 different sizes of pants and several t-shirts for her kid, just to make her happy.

Apparently her hidden agenda was to get an expensive silk saree. Thanks to blogging and other communication studies, I have paid the DUE RESPECT (read kiss AS$) with some load of smart talking and bows. It’s not something I like to do, but it’s really important to save my family from bad mouths during the marriage. Talking of which, a rumour among my relatives is that I am married to Chinese girl and running a secret family in Singapore. Most believe this is true, because in India younger sibling aren’t allowed to get married before the elder. What funny little world they lead!

A priest's secret Identity, one of the cheer up, keep it cool sessions
My Parents are going through lots of pressure (read b1tc@y relatives) these days and I have to constantly find ways to keep them cool. My mom seems to be going through some hormonal problems; she gets very emotional and cries over silly issues. I can handle a DOA career or kiss A@$ relatives but this bothers me much. And also my hair, I badly need a haircut- gosh I hate finding a new hair dresser.

Our sweet little family
Today we got rid of 88 kgs of old books, several clothes, hundreds of CDs, vessels and numerous other stuffs. Some we donated to our maid and some we sold. (In India we can sell used books/clothes/vessels and get money in return for each kilogram) We made 300rs (less than 8 USD) out of it. It’s not a bargain but our need is to revamp and clear some space in the house. Although I wish it could have been a bunch of my relatives rather than my college books. And I bet every penny in return would be a mega profit. In a way I am thankful to all these issues, they keep me alive and becomes something to fight about. Happy holidays to you all!
Srivats

Comments

Carpe Diem said…
yeeeee me firstu :)
Carpe Diem said…
//This is what my brother and I found while searching for inspirational quotes to put in the marriage invite. Needless to say we spend the next ten minutes laughing like mad.


Same here. Me and my bro also came across like this, but it is fun and i enjoyed :)
Carpe Diem said…
//As part of the 3 day ceremony, we are suppose to gift new clothes to our relatives, arrange transportation (if the venue is out of town) and also feed them with DUE RESPECT- All three days!

Same thing going on in my family.Bros and parents having tough time. uffhh i guess doing a wedding is not a big thing handling these relatives...GOD
Carpe Diem said…
I am missing all these.Just giving them the idea only bro's and parents are taking care of everything.
Ramesh said…
Can really understand what you are going through Sri - the Indian wedding has to be the most dysfunctional wedding ever. I thing the popular saying should be paraphrased to say "with relatives like these, who needs enemies" !!

Btw, would love to see a scorpion bitten mad monkey. The concept is mindboggling !!
Vidya said…
I loved this post. It was like R.K Narayan's post! :) Simple, daily activities, to the point with a lot of strikethrough of course! :D

Loved it !
FunScribbler said…
//Although I wish it could have been a bunch of my relatives rather than my college books//

hahahah so true!!!!!!!! relatives can be real pests sometimes (well i guess they are, most of times) but u keep ur cool always. it's dog's nature to bark.. but we shld not bark back at them! remember!!
athivas said…
scorpion bitten mad monkey??!! LOL!!What a way to say that?

Best wishes for your brother's marriage. I really wonder why some relatives are even invited- they bring in much bitter than blessing :(

By the way, you never introduced us to your Chinese wife ;)
athivas said…
//All I want for christmas is you honey, I dont care about whats underneath my christmas tree//

Loved this!!

PS: Now that you are there, your mom must be having quite a breathing space, amidst all these pressures!!
Unknown said…
chance hi nahi...u rock! spatting on the relatives n the web...only u can do it....btw congrats to sriku.
deep said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
deep said…
simple yet too good.. i always enjoy reading such posts..exactly what Vidya said..just like R K Narayan..
though small details...yet one is smiling while reading them..each part of it..!!!

nyways...best wishes to your brother...and May God give you energy and patience to deal with relatives, during next 6 weeks..
Pri said…
firstly, seasons wishes to u and your family! :)
and congratulations to your brother as well...

as for the preparations, i guess thats how big fat indian weddings are all about..so all the best to you!


ohh yaa and not to forget, do keep us all updated on your chinese wifey and kids :p
(but hang on a min..why couldent they rumour about a singaporean wife instead---wud have been more convenient given that u are in s'pore isnt it?)
Prats said…
I can understand ur frustration, getting married soon and all this happening arnd him too.....
Chan said…
Nice post mate...I liked the pics too. Wishing you belated Merry Christmas n Advance happy NY.
Anuraag said…
hi srivats
m always inspired the kind of simplicity u display in your thoughts..i think u r finding it a lil difficult to readjust here...
still the kind of relatives and customs u r mentioning are seemingly too much..may b its more on southern side...
n yes that chinese wife..howz she?? :)
TheUncanny said…
//I have gaps; you have gaps let’s fill each other’s gaps//

omg...ROFL..is that suppose to be inspirational?!?!?!

Its nice srivats, u seeing the fun part of the rumour thingy!!!..good for u..hope ur njoying all the preps en road to the wedding..

BTW, hope ur having a happily married life...keep us posted abt ur chinese wife! hehe
Aarti said…
Chennai vanda udane velai vangaranga pola irukku!! :D nice nice... its fun doing things for weddings but i hate the amt of extravagant expenses and amt of crazy gifts that one needs to give and receive..!! i would rather put aside all the $$ and give it to the couple or open a bank a/c so they can use it anyway they want!!! wonder who will bell the cat called "wedding dowry and gifts"....!!

have fun
take care !!
:)am sure u being here is a big help to ur parents...
Aarti said…
oh, btw,.. been laughing like crazy reading

"I have been running around like a scorpion bitten mad monkey." ... hahahahaha
Aarti said…
and hey,forgot to mention this.. have u seen the movie- Rumour has it? damn cute one!! :D
Vidya said…
okay, I forgot about the Chinese wife! How come you do not have a Singaporean wife? This is very racist, I tell you! :D
Pixie said…
ROTFL at the marriage quote!

De-cluttering can be de-stressing!

Enjoy your time shopping, carting relatives around and the wedding!!

Congrats to your bro as well! :)

And yea, do try and get that haircut before the wedding!! ;)
Annam said…
attendance:)
I happened to have scanned your posts and i find that you love your mom very much :) yeah..u r right..photos did the trick.. All photos are the conversations u had put up about your mom are really sweet and worth reading :)


Cheers
Mahesh
/What funny little world they lead/
Rightly said Sri!you'll find out more funny things before getting your brother married!
Swaram said…
Season's greetings to ur lovely family and honey Sri. May u all b united and may the mutual love last forever :)

Loved that quote and eh, am I glad or wat that I hv passed that wedding phase :P So many qs abt giving n getting ;)
sri said…
@ carpe diem
Hey firsty :) haha i guess tahts the most searched quote , kind of crazy isnt? U are so lucky to have worked those things, ideas are fine doing them is such a pain i tell u.

@ Ramesh
Thats a great saying , u know what I should have titled my post like that LOL.
The scorpion bitten mad monkey is from sanskrit scriptures my dad used to say - mind is like that if not controlled.

@Vidya
//I loved this post. It was like R.K Narayan's post! :) Simple, daily activities, to the point with a lot of strikethrough of course! :D/

RK Narayan who me LOL u must be kidding , but it feels nice i say :)

@Tamiz mango
Correct dhaan, dogs nature to bark our nature to throw stone at it LOL
gosh cant do that with relatives though

@Savi
Well writtern, even I have no idea why they are invited, obviously they dont bring in the positive energy the couple wants :) All i want for christmas is a song by mariah carey try it its good :)
My mom does have a breathing space plus I am also making her go crazy need to be more patient with her
sri said…
@anush
The hope is that they dont read it LOL , sure would pass on da

@ Deep

Thanks so much dear, I badly need that patientce :)

@ Pri
Thanks :) Singapore has many chinese people :) may be thats why or i dont even know how in wildest dreams do they get such romurs :) must be very creative :P


@ Prats
I am not getting married soon :P well thanks buddy

@ Chan
Hello mate, thanks a load for ur wishes, :) wishing u a prosperous and successful year ahead my friend.

@ Vishal
My dearest buddy, I would like to be more simple if possible :) with respect to marriage customs I dont think its easy in any part of the India. Have read chetan bagwat's two states and was so damn overwhelmed by a north Indian wedding :) No comments on the Chinese wife, and for the records I dont like chinese food ;)

@ Theuncanny
Its inspirational depending on your motives hehe :) My marriage life is kind of sucks, u know me being here and my love being there.. u get the drift :P

@Aarti
Exaclty what a waste! especially feeding and giving them all the clothes! oh my i wish they could give it to the Ashram and old age homes, those souls would bless more than the ones coming for wedding. Well I am so forward in many of my thoughts and I am not sure whether I am helpful to my parents or not :) I guess rumour has it is Jennifer's movie right? where she almosts sleeps with her mothers boy friend - or somthing like that.

@ Vidya
I am very much racist when it comes to these affiars LOL :)

@Pixie
I guess I would cut it myself with my shaver/trimmer. Its such a pain i tell u. as far as the shopping goes no I am not happy its not for me :(

@Annam

Attandance ok, homework enna achu, what happen to my friend braham van did u do anything to her ?

@ Mahesh
Welcome brother! happy u liked them :) I just include pictures for those who like visuals more tha words:)something for everyone u see :)

@Aruna
I bet I would do :) I just have to learn to laugh at it more!

@Swaram
I can trust u with your wishes from ur unconditional loving heart. How is/was ur trip ? and hey u havent passed completely u would go through weddings are giver or reciever for quite a long time, until u are in the society i say:)

@
Annam said…
@Annam

Attandance ok, homework enna achu, what happen to my friend braham van did u do anything to her ?
////////////////////
boss neenga orey peelingsula irukurathaala......no ottings adutha post podunga....oru vazhi pannirlam....blog posta
Swaram said…
Passing thru that is better than gng thru our own na .. just too many qs :P hw many sets did u get, hw many houses do they hv, as though I cn keep my feet in more than one @ once LOL :D
Smita said…
Indian Marriages are painful!!!

Despite the fact that u give 400% efforts & go in debt there would be a bunch of relatives who would be unhappy with the way things are....

I vote for registered mrrgs but sadly traditions are more imp.. Humph!!
jehan said…
//As part of the 3 day ceremony, we are suppose to gift new clothes to our relatives, arrange transportation (if the venue is out of town) and also feed them with DUE RESPECT- All three days!//

reminded me much of the traditional wedding my sister and i should had if our dad was alive.. we don't give gifts though but the fact that the traditional wedding consists of three days is exhausting. newly married couples couldn't go at the end of the wedding day to their honeymoon yet. 1st day is the arrival of guests, 2nd day is the wedding proper and 3rd day is the departure of guests. and yes, we need to feed them all and provide transportation should our location is really remote. my mom just wanted us to have simple/practical/modern ceremonies so we didn't have to go through that... i attended a few traditional weddings back home and i enjoyed the travel, food and dancing a lot, haha...
RamNarayanS said…
LOL on the quotation. Wacky one at that. :-) :-)

Isn't that quote "veetai katti paar, kalyaanam panni paar" apt? Demanding relatives and their behind-the-back bitching are the ones to watch for in any marriage. Due Respect - Oh! Absolutely. Otherwise, sappaadu sariyaa illai, mariyaadhai sariyaa pannalai appadinnu moonjiyai thookki vechchukittu suthi muthi irukkuravanga kitta ellaam propagate pannuvaanga :-(

In addition, all that comparison with some other relative's wedding.

This post made for some real real amusing reading, with lots of parallels that I could absolutely relate to.

yaenga, avvalavu thaan vandhudhaa, 88 kg bookskku. :-) No clean up unless and absolutely necessary for me. I'll throw them all in the 'attam'. :-) :-)

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